Wednesday, January 25, 2017

How are you taking care of your friends?


White people, how are you taking care of your friends of color? Straight people, how are you taking care of your queer friends? Men, how are you taking care of your women friends? How are we taking care of our trans friends, our Black friends, our Indigenous friends, our immigrant friends, our Muslim friends, our friends with disabilities? How are we taking care of our friends who are hurting the most right now?

Yesterday, someone told me that, after 10 years, they didn't want to be friends anymore because they hadn't heard from me much the last few months, and that when they did, my responses were "lukewarm." I was going to vaguebook about it because their last message to me was mostly insults, that I didn't have any friends left (uh hi I have some of the greatest friends in the world, everyone else could only be so lucky), but then I realized I was forcing myself to pretend I wasn't hurt by this interaction when I was. I wasn't hurt by their insults because I didn't believe them, and in unpacking what it was that did hurt me, I decided to share this story.